Tag: revision

new Carnivale pages 175-179

Yes, you read that right.

Back in April, I had an idea for how the sequence starting on page 175 of Carnivale should be revised. I had always felt that the original sequence was too small and short. But back in 2013 I was eager to finish the story, so I didn’t revise it. Well, seven years later I finally did.

Here it is…

What struck me as I went to do this was how much my pencilling has changed in seven years. Not only do I use colored pencils in the process, the drawing overall has gotten tighter.

Old 175 pencils versus new 175 pencils.

original Carnivale beginning

I started thumbnailing Carnivale: a Kit Kaleidoscope Story in March of 2004. I got to work on the first finished page in August of 2005. Yet that original beginning didn’t feel right. I was trying too hard to force a Toulouse-LauTrec biography on Kit, having them use sex workers as art models. Upon reflection, I felt that it didn’t seem true to their character and the scene itself felt forced. So I re-thumbnailed the beginning in February of 2008 and started the finished pages that March. That meant that I had fifteen pages that I was throwing out. Some of those pages got reintegrated into the finished story, but the ten-page intro didn’t.

I was thinking about those original ten pages recently. While I still don’t think they work story-wise, I like some of the art in them. So here they are.

The Three Endings of “Defrost”

I have these magazine files that I hold old pages in. Everything is organized chronologically and finished work is interspersed with unfinished ideas. I had a new idea for a story based on something I had thought of years ago, so I was looking through these magazine files earlier this week. That’s when I discovered something that I had completely forgotten about. My story “Defrost,” which is in This Wasn’t the Plan, went through two different endings before settling on the one it has now.

Here’s the first draft ending:

I liked that line “why can’t I be born?” but it also didn’t feel right for what I was trying to get across. It also seemed too much like a standard horror ending. I didn’t want Lucia to be simply afraid of what was coming out of her freezer (yes, I wanted fear, but other emotions as well).

So here’s the second draft:

The second version I scrapped because Lucia and the creature don’t interact. It’s too easily a dream sequence. I wanted something more ambiguous.

But I not only redid the ending for a third time, I redrew the entire story, changing the line work from single line strokes to a more sculptural approach. All the stories in This Wasn’t the Plan are inked this way.

Maybe forgetting I do stuff like this is how I am able to keep doing stuff like this.